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.... Of Cabbages & Kings

23rd January 2010
Famous Quotations

How many of us say things we consider bright or witty, or informative, philosophical and deep, even profound … and wish that somebody, somewhere had recorded it for posterity, so that even after we had passed away, people would occasionally quote them and in so doing, remember us?
Of course, the majority would be wiser hoping that nobody hears half of the nonsense we speak – and in some cases, it would be highly commendable if we went against the old highly recommended piece of advice and insisted on “hiding our light under a bushel”. For you also know the saying: “It is better to keep your mouth shut and let people think you are a fool, than to open it and prove them right,” or words to that effect.
Anyway, enough of the preamble … if I continue for too long, I may just end up proving you guys right.
The few examples that follow are witty, quotable sayings from some of the world’s most famous people, most of them already gone to the great beyond, two of them (I think) still with us. I love them, so I share them with you … in the forlorn hope that someday, even perhaps decades from now, somebody somewhere will repeat something I once said and tell his listeners, “There was this ancient Marquis fellow who wisely (or humorously, or intuitively, or whatever quality they want to attribute to me) said … and follow it up, amazing all present with the enormity of my sagacity and wisdom.
Now, that’s a legacy!
In the meantime, here’s what some other sagacious, wise and humorous folk managed to sneak into the realm of posterity:

Sometimes, when I look at my children, I say to myself ~~”Lillian, you should have remained a virgin.”
-- Lillian Carter (mother of Jimmy Carter)

I had a rose named after me and I was very flattered. But I was not pleased to read the description in the catalog: “No good in a bed, but fine against a wall.”
-- Eleanor Roosevelt

Last week, I stated this woman was the ugliest woman I had ever seen. I have since been visited by her sister, and now wish to withdraw that statement.
-- Mark Twain

The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending; and to have the two as close together as possible.
-- George Burns

 
 

Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people only once a year.
- - Victor Borge

Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.
-- Mark Twain

By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you’ll become happy; if you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher.
-- Socrates

I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.
-- Groucho Marx
I don’t feel old. I don’t feel anything until noon. Then it’s time for my nap.
-- Bob Hope

I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it.
-- W.C. Fields

We could certainly slow the aging process down if it had to work its way through Congress.
-- Will Rogers

Don’t worry about avoiding temptation as you grow older, it will avoid you
-- Winston Churchill

Maybe it’s true that life begins at fifty, but everything else starts to wear out, fall out, or spread out.
-- Phyllis Diller

By the time a man is wise enough to watch his step, he’s too old to go anywhere.
-- Billy Crystal


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