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06th
March 2010
What a Wick:
the last 7 days in 19 (27th Feb-5th March, 2010)
 Decisions,
decisions, decisions. Jake decided to choose
Vienna. Yup. Good or bad choice? Hmmm. Don’t
ask me. I will keep my two cents in my pocket
because it’s still guava season around
these parts. But what I will say is that I’m
happy they chose St. Lucia since we were able
to get some good publicity as a result. Hopefully
when I travel from now on I will encounter fewer
people who wonder aloud whether St. Lucia is
Jamaica or near Jamaica.
Anyway, this Wick let’s look at some other
decisions made. Good? Bad? It’s up to
you.
1. Catholics in France have some decisions to
make if they want to confess their sins. A confession
hotline has been set up and the operator gives
the options:”For advice on confessing,
press one. To confess, press two. To listen
to some confessions, press three… In case
of serious or mortal sins -- that is, sins that
have cut you off from Christ our Lord, it is
indispensable to confide in a priest”.
2. Tiger has made the decision to start focusing
on golf again.
3. Obama has made some bad food choices since
becoming president and now his cholesterol is
up to a borderline-high at 209.
4. An Englishman got fined and had his license
suspended because he chose to walk his dog without
actually walking himself. He held on to the
dog’s leash and drove alongside it as
it walked.
5. Faced with the decision of a new refrigerator?
You now have a choice of one with Internet access,
made by South Korea’s Samsung.
6. Buju Banton made the decision to plead entrapment
but I’m skeptical given that there is
video evidence of him tasting cocaine and making
arrangements for its sale.
7. Mo’Nique admitted this week that her
decision not to shave her legs hinges on her
husband’s love of hairy legs.
8. Authorities made a decision to arrest a Swedish
pilot for using a fake license while he was
in the cockpit ready to take off with 101 passengers.
You’d never have guessed that this pilot
had been flying passengers for 13 years and
had logged 10000 flight hours over that period,
using that same fake license.
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9.
A World Bank report indicated that a deficiency
in health care in the Caribbean is partly due
to Caribbean nurses’ decision to migrate
to the more developed countries.
10. The 11 year old son of the president of
Azerbaijan decided that he wanted 9 mansions
in Dubai, costing $44 million, and that’s
what he got.
11. A Chinese teacher chose to punish misbehaving
kindergarteners by pricking them on their hands,
feet and bottoms with a hypodermic needle. She’s
awaiting the court’s decision.
12. A family left Haiti after the devastation
there, but it turns out that Chile was not the
best choice for refuge. But to the Desarmes’
credit, they did survive two major earthquakes.
13. A group of parents in the Philippines decided
that because the feeding programme at their
children’s school was below par, the school
was of no use, so they burned it down.
14. Even before he died, a life-long smoker
decided that he wanted the words “Smoking
Killed Me” displayed on his hearse and
at the gravesite. This Englishman’s wish
was granted.
15. In a German village people can decide which
pothole they want to purchase. The money paid
(€50) is used to repair the pothole and
the owner of the former pothole gets to put
a personal message where the hole once was.
16. Victims of Allen Stanford’s scheme
have decided to launch a global campaign, “Anti-Crime,
Anti-Antigua”, to discourage tourists
and investors from supporting the island.
17. A former madam has decided to run for the
governorship of New York. She claimed that the
knowledge gained from running a prostitution
business will be helpful in running a state.
18. Britons are not too pleased about the decision
by the government to place cameras in household
bins since this could lead to charges based
on what and how much they throw out.
19. Of all the vehicles in a parking lot, a
German man chose a police car to line up his
drug to snort.
Consider yourselves up to speed…
Discuss
Story
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