Old Ben’s gift

It has become a habit to reminisce and discuss the defining events, or the important inventions and discoveries, of the last century and of the millennium. Good. Fine by me. It all makes for pleasant, reflective subject matter. And for almost no reason at all – I’m not saying that it is the greatest discovery; and then again, some might consider it to be; no matter, this is not a test. I was simply in that frame of mind – I thought about electricity.
Electricity. It is one of the most useful discoveries ever made, isn’t it? O.K., I know that it has the potential to be extremely, even fatally dangerous, if proper care is not taken around it, but then, one could almost say that same thing about a skunk (I did say almost). And just think, where would we be, if old Ben Franklin hadn’t tied that key to his kite and gone playing about on that stormy evening?
Oh, we’d still have illumination at night – before electricity, gas lamps were already keeping things bright, in homes and on street corners. And even today, people who live in isolated areas and others, like campers and such, can testify to the utility and efficiency of gas lighting – but it is some of the other uses of electricity which have had the most impact on civilization.
For example, there would be no radio or television; no airplanes (don’t even think of a space program); no computers or internet; no ATM’s; no cable cars (there goes San Francisco’s special charm); no automobiles: imagine having to stop every mile or so to throw wood on a fire, in order to keep your steam-driven engine going; no elevators;… and the list goes on.
Those things are self-evident. But there are other, little-thought-of consequences which would exist, if there were no electricity. For example, what would those kids, who were wanting to emulate their hero, old Ben, and go kite-flying (this applies only to the “good old days.” Kids today do not go kite-flying), do? Without electricity, there would be no overhead wires; and were it not for the kite strings getting caught in the wires and breaking, they would never leave off and go home to supper, or even to sleep. The number of broken kites which used to decorate street poles and wires was testimony that that was the usual way in which a day of kite-flying ended.
It was also testimony of course, that there were some pretty dumb kids in those days, who were not recognizing how dangerous it was to do their kite-flying in the vicinity of power lines (any of our smarter, brighter kids today would know better, right?)
And what about the pigeons? If there were no overhead wires running above the sidewalks, where would they sit, whenever they wanted to take aim at some passing lady’s fancy hat, or some prime gentleman’s shiny bald head below? A major source of amusement would be lost to the chaps who usually sit on the wall across the way and take bets as to who gets it next. And without the entertainment, they’d probably wander off and get themselves into all kinds of trouble.
Without electricity too, there’d be no blaring rock concerts with extensive, mind-boggling light shows; the audiences would be smaller, since the singers could only throw their voices just so far – opera singers would probably still be the only music superstars; and without electricity, the people living in the vicinity of the neighbourhood blockos would be able to get to sleep at night.
I know of one group who would be laughing their heads off with glee, in an electricity less world: the guys on death row in the prisons where the electric chair is the method of execution chosen. Imagine – there you are, strapped into the chair, and the guy in charge throws the switch; you may sit there for days, months, years, forever, waiting for the charge to hit; and all this time, you have to be fed and taken care of.
The fellow at the switch could probably pass away before the felon; and of old age, at that.
Water would never boil in your electric kettle; nor would that cold food warm up in your microwave oven. And the only way to get ice cubes for your cold drink would be to carve them from a chunk of ice snapped off from a passing glacier… or iceberg, if you’re at sea, on your yacht (though I wouldn’t advise the latter. Rumour has it that that’s what the bartender of the Titanic had in mind; and you know what happened to him and his clientele).
Well, hats off to old Ben. He probably never fully realized the potential of the invaluable gift he has given us all. Thank God his kite didn’t get caught on a power line, that fateful, stormy night. That could have caused his plans to blow a fuse, and left us all in the dark.